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27 junio

blahh

 
I feel lonely today
I know it's pathetic to feel sorry for myself but I just do.
At times like this I just want to crawl into bed and forget to breathe, forget to keep my heart beating.
I just want to go to sleep and never wake up. 
Instead of studying for the coming midterm exams I Googled "suicide notes", and some of the notes that I read made me even sadder.
For instance there was this note, written by a father to his son:
 
Jimmy!
 
Remember what I told you and always respect, protect and obey your mother and always remember that I love you so much. I am going to leave you forever because I am too sick to go on. God bless you my Son and when your time comes to go to Heaven you will find your ole Pappy waiting for you.
 
Daddy
 
This note made me sad because he tries to reassure his son by saying that he will wait for him "in heaven"... and I've been taught that suicides are condemned to hell. I wish God would forgive this man but I've been brought up as a Roman Catholic and I have my doubts...
 
2008